The world according to Kirkey
Seeking literary stimulus whilst lazing in the garden soaking up the scintillating sunshine – a pretty rare British occurrence – I decided to harness the power of social media. Ever so slightly exaggerating my status and always looking for the double entendre I declared, “Laying naked in the garden looking for inspiration for a topic … Read more
As a practising hypochondriac I have never been slow to react to a bodily function giving me distress. Anything from man flu upwards usually necessitates a Google health check, or a conversation with someone in the medical fraternity. In my quest for immortality this proportionate response has given me a high degree of reassurance. However, … Read more
Music of the Spheres World Tour: Cardiff, Tuesday 6th June 2023. I feel embarrassed. Confused. Dumbfounded and distressed. I’ve lived my life with scant awareness of one of life’s most exceptional experiences. Coldplay live! That is, until I was educated at the Principality Stadium, bang in the middle of the Welsh capital, whereupon an eruption … Read more
A not so long time ago, in the Milky Way galaxy, I once had some pretty far, far away thoughts. Apologies to all Star Wars aficionados out there for my clumsy corruption of the opening sequence, but in keeping with one of the principal characters, I used to look like Chewbacca: hair fucking everywhere. My … Read more
Five years ago, I wore a blue rosette on my coat, knocked on doors and asked residents to vote for me. They did, and I was elected a councillor. In fact, I also won two subsequent local elections. A few weeks ago I stood down and have no intention to ever again cast a vote … Read more
One of the more bizarre birthday gifts ever bestowed on me arrived by email. I had to read it a couple of times, if only to fully manage my disappointment: an Alpaca walk. I had little appetite to get up close and personal with an animal I knew little about; and I’d read that they … Read more
Humanity is beautiful, bizarre, and barbaric. Since I am human, I am allowed to make such a delightful and damning statement and I intend to comprehensively prove my assertion ─ but let me first frame the formation of this eureka moment. During a recent engaging and often chaotic conversation with a friend, I grasped a … Read more
What has the epic conclusion to the 2022/23 Vanarama National League got to do with the legendary authors Dame Agatha Christie, Sir Arthur Conan-Doyle and Raymond Chandler? Stay with me for the full ninety minutes, plus added time, a wedge of extra time, and penalties, and I’ll reveal all. But first, I’d like to take … Read more
I’ve changed jobs, partners, and invariably my mind. I have flip-flopped on politics, places to live, and even giving parental advice to my kids. But change my football club? Never! According to the National Human Genome Research Institute, “DNA sequencing refers to the general laboratory technique for determining the exact sequence of nucleotides, or bases, … Read more
The word “promotion” is defined as an attempt to make a product or event popular or successful, especially by advertising. I’ve met many speedway promoters and their remit would appear to be much wider, albeit this principal business outcome reigns supreme – getting folk through the turnstiles on a regular basis and encouraging them to … Read more