What should we talk about today?
The world according to Kirkey
Sitting minding my own business, drinking a cuppa, the general hubbub of Starbucks was occasionally perforated by the shrill call of a name: “Oscar!” then another, “Sherlock!” and finally, “Hugo!” I was, on one hand, glad that my own kids have grown up and left home, but on the other, I was perplexed. This group … Read more
The Imperial War Museum stands proudly in the leafy suburb of Lambeth, South-East London, protected by two magnificent naval guns pointed upward and poised to thwart an imaginary foe. My previous visits to this iconic structure have always left me feeling incredibly proud of our armed services, and in particular how we stood resolute against … Read more
The late, great, footballer, Jimmy Greaves, is credited with coining the phrase – “It’s a funny old game!” The same can be said about speedway as club fortunes can often experience glory one season, then gloom the next. Peterborough fans will testify to that in recent years. With the often unpredictable nature of rider averages, … Read more
Eating steak had never had this effect on me before, but this was my first time at 4 Gats – the quintessentially quirky Catalonian restaurant in Barcelona. Opened in 1897, it was renowned as the foremost meeting place of the artistic, eccentric, and supposed outsiders. I felt immediately at ease; no doubt I was sitting … Read more
I vividly recall, as a young cop, being locked in a police cell in Bracknell police station. The prank was orchestrated by a couple of the shift elders and was part and parcel of the rituals of being accepted into the fold. Scaring new recruits shitless was a 1980s tradition that typified the slow transition … Read more
My first contact with the vagina was by way of a remote viewing. A mate excitedly explained that he had found a stash of discarded “nudie books” in a ditch proximate to a local lorry park. Aged twelve, my curiosity ─ coupled with pulsing pre-pubescent itches ─ made the thought of seeing a naked woman … Read more
Swearing my oath of allegiance to Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II all those years ago was, at the time, a purely symbolic act; the rite of passage into my previous career as a cop. At the conclusion of this pledge I became a servant of the Crown. This heavyweight commitment was memorable for a unique … Read more
The philosophy of identity has been the subject of unceasing debate since the origin of humankind. If you are so minded, you can read the classical scholarly accounts, including the marathon poem ‘The Odyssey,’ understood to have been penned by Homer around the eighth century BC, which, amongst other things, connects with the notion of … Read more
Your natural glow has been dimmed by the darkness, but your courage and bravery pulses strobe like and so powerfully that you have made me blink. The path ahead will be tough, treacherous and at times terrifying, but you will make it. We have some important dates to fulfil – Meadow Lane, Sydney, and Orlando … Read more
Looking back on my sex life, I will admit that I was an awfully late developer. I recall sex education lessons at school in the dim and distant past – the titters, uncomfortable swinging of legs under the wooden chairs, the standard video of a cross-sectional female – with one leg ─ and animated sperm … Read more