What should we talk about today?
The world according to Kirkey
Have you ever met someone by chance, looked across a crowded room, or passed somebody in the street, unexpectedly experiencing an excited tingle? I know I have and on occasions this colloquial collision of contact has led to convivial conversations, friendships, and on rarer occasions, sex. I was keen to map this latter route to … Read more
I was pretty much late to the party losing my virginity ─ at the relatively ripe age of nineteen in an Austrian chalet with my Julie. From what I can recall of this cumming of age, it was behind closed doors, in a bed, with the lights out. I guess, in my defence, it was … Read more
Seeking literary stimulus whilst lazing in the garden soaking up the scintillating sunshine – a pretty rare British occurrence – I decided to harness the power of social media. Ever so slightly exaggerating my status and always looking for the double entendre I declared, “Laying naked in the garden looking for inspiration for a topic … Read more
Eyes closed, deep breathing punctuated by a regular groan of ultimate pleasure, and a feeling of real ecstasy. I could suffer this pleasure for eternity. Ooh ─ a virgin piece of skin – keep going! During this special, intimate, time I don’t have a care in the world, and the wish to be reincarnated as … Read more
My personal pathway to pornography was – I guess – progressive, in as much as my first contact or event involved a relatively tranquil take-off ─ flicking through the pages of a well-thumbed and discarded magazine in a local lorry park, aged around twelve, with my mate Alan. This experience was somewhat delicate when compared … Read more
French philosopher René Descartes declared, “I think, therefore I am.” I have never had an issue with the initial claim of this assertion, but the conclusion has – in my opinion – always been open to conjecture. Who I am, what makes me, me, and what is the essence of me, have been perennial puzzles … Read more
The Book of Mormon engages with the terrains of disinformation, religious ideology, and hope; influences that affect everyone, but most just doff their hats in the general direction and conveniently shuffle away. Intertwined with female genital mutilation, dysentery and fucking frogs, the show manages to be both hilarious and powerfully thought-provoking. Sticking a finger up … Read more
I vividly recall, as a young cop, being locked in a police cell in Bracknell police station. The prank was orchestrated by a couple of the shift elders and was part and parcel of the rituals of being accepted into the fold. Scaring new recruits shitless was a 1980s tradition that typified the slow transition … Read more
My first contact with the vagina was by way of a remote viewing. A mate excitedly explained that he had found a stash of discarded “nudie books” in a ditch proximate to a local lorry park. Aged twelve, my curiosity ─ coupled with pulsing pre-pubescent itches ─ made the thought of seeing a naked woman … Read more
Looking back on my sex life, I will admit that I was an awfully late developer. I recall sex education lessons at school in the dim and distant past – the titters, uncomfortable swinging of legs under the wooden chairs, the standard video of a cross-sectional female – with one leg ─ and animated sperm … Read more