What should we talk about today?
The world according to Kirkey
iankirkebc 
I was recently scolded for my seemingly persistent use of the double entendre on social media. My guilt is overwhelming, with my allegiance to the “nudge, nudge, wink, wink” approach of comedy undeniable – a humorous expression used to imply a hidden or suggestive meaning without stating it directly has become my primary route to … Read more
The UK weather in early January is usually equivalent to wintertime in Siberia, especially the coastal regions where the wind-chill factor can scare off the most robust of brass monkeys. So why on earth had I decided to embark upon the epic trek up to the Northeast Lincolnshire seaside resort of Cleethorpes? Membership of the … Read more
2024 review: Matches: 31 New grounds: 4 (Bradford City, Tranmere Rovers, Carlisle United and Barrow AFC) Miles travelled: 9,317 Money spent in the club shop: a ridiculous amount Kits bought: 3 adult shirts and 4 children’s kits Medically insane? Yes Memories: to last a lifetime COYP! © Ian Kirke 2024 @ iankirke.bsky.social
A recent Facebook post provoked a sudden synaptic spasm: Some people think it’s peculiar that I am a Notts County season ticket holder and follow them all over the country whilst living in Berkshire, questioning my sanity and the amount of money that I spend on this enduring pursuit. But I’m not daft! In comparison … Read more
Following Parliament’s historic decision Kirkey poses the question, “when do you want to die?” Even in the darkest recesses of humanity, humour has its rightful place. Triboulet, a 16th century jester at the royal court of King Francis I, smacked the rotund bottom of his boss in a fit of farce. The unimpressed monarch decreed … Read more
To the ordinary Brit urine literally flows through mainstream culture. The vernacular is awash with references to this yellow fluid. Do you think I’m taking the piss? Look outside it’s almost certainly pissing down. But don’t piss about or your performance will inevitably be piss-poor. Better to celebrate and get pissed than to get pissed … Read more
Errors are a part of life. However, I would assert that there is a hierarchy of miscalculations, with those that occupy the higher echelons of mistake worthy of raising a red flag. The signing of a goalkeeper who drops the pen prior to signing the contract would rightly be alarming. Although I’ve never been party … Read more
For the majority of my adult years I’ve had to conform with the rules of life, both written and informal. At times, the societal norms I am obliged to yield to frustrate me, and the more I explore the world the more I realise that, although many commonalities exist, wonderful exceptions are evident too, especially … Read more
I do admit to being a professional potty mouth. My filler expletive regularly engages with my favourite and most versatile of profane words: fuck. Its versatility is pretty much limitless: both a verb and a noun, an expression of elation and disappointment, a call to action and a decision to sit it out. As an … Read more
